What are the things to watch out for in a bus ride in the Philippines?
A bus ride in a third world country like the Philippines is a gruelling experience, Being a “not rich” person governed by corrupt, evil, irresponsible, public servants, means I would have to endure this form of travel just like the majority of my people.
The Philippines is a very beautiful county, blessed with so many natural resources and beautiful places. And its people is its richest resource, so they say. But when it comes to government and provision of public service such as public transport, we terribly suck.
To get to the point, I will describe what is the average bus ride in the country’s most popular major thoroughfare: the EDSA. Currently, one need not find the bus stop to ride a bus. The whole highway is considered by both bus drivers and commuters as the bus stop, at any corner, intersection, or lane of the 6-lane highway. Weird? only in the Philippines, I think.
How do you hail a bus? Raise your hand while you’re still on the sidewalk, make sure you had eye contact with the driver, no eye contact, no bus ride, and walk towards the bus as it approaches. The thing is, you have to meet at least halfway. Just be sure you dodge the other oncoming vehicles. Weird? only in the Philippines.
How do you get on the bus? Remember the raised arms, maintain that position. the driver will not stop the bus, it will just slow down, unless there are other passengers. If you are alone, be ready to grab the handrail and pull yourself in. Weird? only in the Philippines.
Am I on the right bus? no need to read the bus route. Half the windshield is plastered with at least a dozen destinations and landmarks. just tell the bus conductor where you’re going and they’ll get you there as long as it’s still in EDSA. Sounds like a taxi or a cab? Yes and they drive like one also. A bus snaking through EDSA overtaking right and left, racing with other buses. Weird? Only in the Philippines.
Refreshments, anyone? “Hopia, mani, balut, popcorn, zesto, coke, royal, sprite, piskraker, pugo, stork, juicy, mais” (chinese bread snack, peanuts, duck egg, orange juice in tetrapack, sodas, quail eggs, candies, gums) the list of products hawked by vendors inside the bus could be endless. These snacks come in handy especially when there’s a massive traffic jam, which is most of the time very common in EDSA.
Getting in touch with your Creator? No worries, sometimes preachers will deliver readings from the Bible and would solicit “love offerings” (donations after a couple of minutes of catechism).
Is there a lovers’ lane? Yes, just like in the movie theaters, the back rows are usually for lovers making out. They are occupied in the wee hours of the night or at any other time of the day as long as the bus is not crowded.
How do you know if the bus is ’standing room only’? If there’s only one person standing on the aisle, he’s the conductor collecting fare.
to be continued…
I was watching TV while waiting for our bill at the Vigan Plaza Hotel last Monday. Tado made a comment something like “pangbading ang performance nyo” and Vice Ganda lambasted Tado. My wife even commented ‘kawawa naman si Tado.’ I would say uncalled for ang remark ni Tado, pero over the top naman ang reaction ni Vice Ganda. Vice Ganda wants people to respect all gays, but respect is something that is earned and not forced. Besides, Tado is still entitled to his opinion. Turn ni Tado na magbigay ng opinion bilang judge, umepal lang tong si Vice Ganda, hindi makapaghintay ng turn nya. Questions: ang noon time show bang yun ay pag-aari niya? Si vice Ganda ba e masyado ng maere? si Vice Ganda ba ay tulad na rin ni Willie? Comment: Para sa isang mahilig din mangbastos ng mga contestants at manlait, si Vice Ganda ay isang pikon.
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